(https://images2.imgbox.com/de/ff/yX94AdvF_o.jpg) | Things on campus were pretty slow today. The week of Thanksgiving was growing closer which meant that a lot of students that lived on the campus grounds in the dorms would be going home for the holiday. If any were still around, that was only to gather their course materials for the small break to work on. Sho wasn't one of those people that lived on campus but considering after that week of the holidays, his Heat would roll around, he was on campus to gather double the course work. While he may not be able to get it all done, he could at least have half of it worked on, which is what he was intending to do. He'd already submitted two chapters of his online comic in so it was just going through revisions and meeting up with the artist he was working with to get those two chapters drawn out. He didn't think his little fantasy adventure comic story would be interesting to others but he was happy that it was well-received and readers wanted more. He was working hard to keep the story on the right path and avoiding straying too far off to have everyone confused when they read it. He didn't know how many more chapters to it he was going to write but there was no denying that the green-eyed young man was having fun writing and sharing it. At least working on his comic book story would be off his mind during the duration of his Heat. Lord knows he'd never be able to focus on it during it or anything else for that matter. But that wasn't the only dilemma that was running about his brain. On top of dealing with arranging for things in his personal life to be squared away for when he'll be out of class, there was also that nagging remembrance of that business meeting he attended with Sadie a week ago. He wasn't fond of being sexually harassed by the man named Usui Tatsuya that he spoke with and he'd hit him out of retaliation for it. He hadn't liked that he'd done that but he'd done it and he had to deal with it. Safe to say that Sho definitely disliked this man and if he hadn't stopped Sadie from trying to beat the hell out of him, he probably would've had more than just broken bones and limbs to contend with. This was concerning but the more awkward part about the entire ordeal was seeing his old friend Yuuto White again. Or rather Yuuto Usui now. It's not surprising he didn't recognize the family name or the relation since his old friend at that time didn't use the family name. Sho never questioned it or believed he needed to because it didn't matter. However now, it did make him curious as to why he'd accept it after rejecting it. It showed that there was clearly a lot about Yuuto that he didn't know or never got to chance to know before the other male had broken off their friendship out of the blue. Sho had no idea what to say to him and the air between them was just ... awkward ... Yuuto had admitted to wanting to mend their friendship but Sho was naturally unsure. He didn't know if he could go down that road again being left with unanswered questions from someone who just blindly followed what their family told them to do. Especially when he knew that Yuuto didn't like his family all that much because of how he spoke ill of them. Except for his sister and Sho didn't even know she existed. He'd never gone to Yuuto's home when they were friends. They always hung out at his home in his room. Remembering all of that bothered him. Mainly because it hurt. He'd managed to move on and make some friends on his own. Albeit, they're very strange from what he was used to in terms of people to associate with but they didn't seem like people who would just leave him hanging the way Yuuto had with that air of mystery with the question of "what made you do this?". Shaking his head, Sho released a sigh as he held onto the folder in his hands with all his upcoming school assignments and tests that he would need to study for while walking about the courtyard which was very scarce with people. This meant, he could find an empty table to sit at and sort through all his assignments and put them in order based on what he needed to do first, and work from there. There were a couple of tables outside already occupied so Sho went for the table that was stationed underneath one of the large trees. The shading was also a plus. Winter was creeping in slowly and while it was cool outside, it was also warmer more than it was cold. Settling on this, Sho made his way to the empty table, setting his things atop it before sitting down. He needed a distraction to stop his mind from wandering so much on things he'd tried putting behind him. 'Besides, can't fix what's already been done. Why ... try now ...?' Sho thought as he opened the folder with all his assignments in it and began sorting through them. |
(https://images2.imgbox.com/de/ff/yX94AdvF_o.jpg) | Sho had sorted up the first half of his assignments that he would begin working on as soon as he returned to his room at the inn. These assignments were the ones that would be due sooner than the others, which meant they had to be worked on immediately, otherwise, he'd end up with a failing grade. Something he hadn't wanted. He was thankful to not have professors that were super anal about assignments or complaining when students couldn't attend classes due to their Heats or Ruts. Those were things that unfortunately couldn't be avoided. Complaining about it seemed asinine anyway. But he had peers that did have such professors and he couldn't help but feel bad for them, especially when they were just given failing grades while having proper excuses as to why they could physically be present in class. Sho was surprised he was able to keep his grades and GPA up given that his Heats were always painful. But thanks to Austin being around, it did help to have a friend near him, even if it was to make sure he ate something. Currently, his job had him busy so they weren't able to hang out as much but Sho understood that. Not as if he was going to be requesting Austin's time frequently since he personally didn't want to cause his friend any problems. But at times, he couldn't help but think that he was despite his kindness and being told that his agent keeps asking him where he's often spending his time. And the space between them helped to keep people from getting the wrong ideas about them. While everyone else may have been searching for mates, Sho was just fine making friends. He'd rather have friends instead of the expectation to mate and start a family. Of course, that sounded rather contradictory considering what happened recently. He wanted friends he could trust and not ones that would turn him loose once they were given the opportunities they wanted. Doing that makes it hard for anyone to trust people. Which is what became of Sho. And it was clear that his former friend Yuuto wanted to start over and mend their friendship. He didn't know if he could do it ... Trust him again ... Sure how it ended was very confusing but during that time, having Yuuto as a friend then at least made him feel like he was actually liked by someone and didn't think his interests and hobbies were odd. He'd managed to move on from it to where he hadn't thought about the other in a while. Now he was back and the green-eyed young man had no idea what he should even say to him. What could be said now that he would even accept or believe? Given how he'd been mistreated by people in the past, it's not a surprise at all that he was weary at the concept of the two of them ever fixing things. Still ... that lingering part of him that used to nag at him for a long time began to return and he just wanted answers. He'd probably feel the same regardless but at least after all this time, he'd have answers. However, he hadn't planned on trying to see Yuuto again. The business deal Sadie was working on with his family was up to her now. Sho wasn't needed for anything after. He could focus his attention where it needed to be: on school and work. Having sorted the first stack of assignments together, he straightened the papers up before laying them face down in the folder and then began to sort through the second stack of assignments he'd have to work on later. This was overwhelming but like always, he managed. He gave a small yawn as he put the assignments in order by date, all the while not looking up from them since he needed to make sure he arranged them properly to what he'd work on next once he was done with the first batch. |
(https://images2.imgbox.com/de/ff/yX94AdvF_o.jpg) | Sho was lost in thought while organizing the rest of his assignments together. So much so that he was hardly paying attention to his surroundings. Normally he would be but with the campus being pretty scarce today, it seemed unnecessary in his mind to be on edge about being around a crowd of unfamiliar people that weren't even around. Scattered students here and there, but they weren't in large groups like they normally were. It'd made being able to focus easier for him without having to go find someplace to hide to have peace and quiet. That was usually the library but it felt less suffocating outside without so many people wandering about. However, that would soon backfire on him when a familiar voice spoke up out of nowhere, startling him and causing him to drop a few of the papers in his hand on the table in front of him. He would never forget that voice and he didn't think he would have to hear it again. It would seem like always, Sho had the misfortune of being in constant awkward situations with people. He doesn't immediately turn to look behind him but he knew that Yuuto was there. Instead, he sighed and picked up the pages of assignments that slipped out of his hands and properly arranged them where he originally placed them in the stack that was in his hands. His expression was straight-faced but it wasn't difficult to see the discomfort he had. It was clear as day in his body language. After all, Sadie would tell him all the time he was easy to read without having to say anything at all. That said, he didn't know if Yuuto would be upset or bothered by that or not. He clearly wasn't the same person he was years ago. Some aspects of him were still there but he only felt comfortable expressing it around those he trusted. And right now, he still didn't trust Yuuto. "I didn't know you attended classes here," Sho finally replied in monotone as he sat the second stack of his assignments in the folder and closed it with the others. He wasn't wrong in what he said. This would be the first time he'd ever seen his former friend on campus. If the other was still pursuing art as a career, it's not a surprise they wouldn't bump into one another. That and Sho preferred to take his classes during the day and take everything home to work on it unlike everyone else who hung out on campus and did their assignments wherever they felt comfortable. The less things and people setting off his anxiety the better. What he was currently feeling now with Yuuto behind him wasn't anxiety. What he was feeling was uncertainty. Uncertain of what to do besides trying to leave. But for some reason, some part of him was telling him to stay and he was unsure of why... That said, he placed his hands in his lap, only to look down at them and begin to fidget. "Do you need something, Usui-san?" Sho asked, sticking to addressing Yuuto formally for the time being. |
(https://images2.imgbox.com/de/ff/yX94AdvF_o.jpg) | This was more awkward than the meeting in his home. The difference was Sadie isn't present and it was just the two of them. Hearing Yuuto say he attended classes occasionally could only mean that he was taking the rest of them online. That did make a lot more sense and it would also explain why he never saw him around campus at all. So that was one mystery out of the way. It wasn't much of one but it doesn't take a lot to deduce that. Sho had no intention of pressing further since it wasn't his place to ask personal questions. They weren't that close anymore and to him, it just felt wrong to pry. What he wasn't expecting from Yuuto was wishing him a late Happy Birthday. This year Sho had decided to take a break from the idea of parties and just wanted to relax alone on that day. He was never one to expect gifts or parties from his friends but after having met Sadie, it was just something he got used to and reluctantly accepted. But after how his party turned out last year or rather what it turned into, he was definitely not feeling it this year. He still received gifts or cards from other friends and his parents and he appreciated them. Sho was not expecting Yuuto to get him anything. Again, they haven't seen each other in years nor have they been friends for quite some time. So seeing that the other male had gotten him something was a surprise which made the green-eyed young man raise his brow with his gaze shifting in the direction of Yuuto's bag. He continued to sit there and watch as he'd taken out comic books in their plastic covers and sat them on the table close to him. Normally, he would be excited to receive Western Comics from almost anyone but he couldn't help feeling that he shouldn't accept such a gift from Yuuto. Hesitantly, he reached his hand upward to touch the first comic if only to move it to sift through the issues. 'So he still remembers that I like comics books,' he thought as he carefully straightened the books back up. "A-Arigatou," he thanked him in a soft tone. "You ... didn't have to get me anything," Sho told him. He really didn't but there was nothing that could be done about it now. Despite how he personally felt, he couldn't act ungrateful about this exchange and he didn't want Yuuto to feel bad about it either. |
(https://images2.imgbox.com/de/ff/yX94AdvF_o.jpg) | Admittedly, Sho thought this was a gift out of guilt that Yuuto was giving him. Maybe some part of it was. He'd expected the other male to gift him and leave but instead, he'd sat down at the table across from him, having no choice but to give his former friend his full attention. Though he had shifted his gaze to look away in the other direction, especially after hearing what he'd said. For some reason, it'd almost sounded like some form of hope but he knew better and learned a long time ago to stop being so hopeful whenever people dropped out of his life at the drop of a hat. Sho never thought much about his birthday anymore. It was usually everyone around him that would bring it up while he was just living through the day like he did every day before it. He didn't expect that to change every birthday. Plus, he didn't like the attention anyway. More so with the parties that Sadie throws him getting weirder and uncomfortable each year. It was why he didn't want a party. He was fine and he was happy that everyone remembered enough to get him something and appreciated it. However, right now, being given a gift from Yuuto didn't give the young man that same feeling. Not to mention, the way Yuuto spoke to him, he made it seem as if they were still friends. That felt like a lie. They haven't been friends since junior high. He'd also managed to thought think about Yuuto either. With so many things on his plate and his circle of friends becoming a variety of different people, why would he think about the other male after all this time? He had no reason to. Being overwhelmed by his thoughts had caused his hand that was still on top of the slip-covered books to tremble a bit. Immediately, he pulled it back if only to cover it with his other hand. But there was no hiding how nervous he was which was causing his anxiety to spike a little. "I-I should go ... I can't ... accept this," Sho finally spoke in a shaky tone. He stood up, reaching his hand out slowly for the folder with all his assignments in it but there was no hiding just how much it'd begun to tremble more compared to earlier. |
(https://images2.imgbox.com/de/ff/yX94AdvF_o.jpg) | Sho grabbed his folder with his assignments in it, holding it close to his chest while grabbing his back with his other hand in an attempt to leave. The only thing that had stopped him from doing so was Yuuto stating out of the blue that he was almost homeless. He wasn't sure how to respond to that but for a moment, it did allow the green-eyed young man to actually give his former friend his attention if showing that his interest was met with skepticism. The explanation he'd wanted for so long had been finally given to him and as the other had told him everything that'd happened, Sho had no idea how to respond to any of it. What could he say? There was nothing to be said that would make any of what Yuuto told him sound anything like a good time to be had. However, it did make sense now. Everything made sense now. The interference of family was the most common when it came to those from prolific families. They always had their parents breathing down their necks for one reason or another. The only problem with this was when the two of them were friends, Yuuto never spoke of his family much so Sho didn't know what was going on with him. From what he could remember during their time being friends, Yuuto would avoid talking about his family or avoid wanting to go home and the two of them would just hang out with one another. At that time, it just felt nice to not be treated strangely for having a hobby involving Western culture and he was never made to feel that way whenever he was around Yuuto. That and Sho himself never had to deal with the same troubles regarding family that others did. It sounded very sad to hear that he didn't feel like he had any ties with his family on either side but it doesn't erase the fact that he still chose the family he did had over their friendship. But he did feel relieved for some reason to know that he didn't stop being friends with him because of anything he'd done or because he hated him. More like it was simply out of his control. Sho understood that yet it still upset him that he couldn't at least tell him this years ago. As Yuuto had stood back up, Sho had sat back down but with his back facing the other male as he tightly gripped the folder in his hand as he'd no longer been able to hold back his tears that'd begun to fall. He was feeling an array of emotions right now but the most obvious one was still angry at how all of this transpired, to begin with. "You idiot," Sho finally replied, sniffling as he dried his face with the back of his hand, "There was nothing stopping you from telling me this instead of choosing to not be friends with me anymore. You were the only friend I had at that time. You didn't think once that I would've tried to help you if you'd asked me?" Why wouldn't he have helped him back then? They were friends then. He wouldn't have allowed Yuuto to feel trapped if he'd told him what was really going on. He didn't know what that kind of help and friendship was like until he'd met Sadie and the other friends he'd managed to make as he'd become older. He didn't need money and status to help someone, he would've wanted to and asked his parents if they were willing to accommodate Yuuto. It would've been a lot to ask but it was better than not trying. Now that opportunity had been lost to both of them. There was no getting it back. But Sho finally had that closure he always longed for even if it was truly depressing for the both of them. For Yuuto to go through it and for Sho having to listen to it and find out that's what'd been going on all these years. He could only sympathize with how the both of them felt alone but they dealt with that loneliness in different ways as they grew older and apart from one another. It was clear that Yuuto was desperately looking for forgiveness from him but Sho was unsure about it. He'd been offered the comics again, turning his head to look back at his former friend who held the books in his hand. It only caused him to show a much-saddened expression as he dried his face again. "I can't accept them. I can't ... be certain you won't make me regret it if I do. It feels like I'm getting my hopes up and I don't want to or like doing that to myself. As for your family ... who's to say they won't try and interfere with what you do again? And ... after what I did to your brother, I'm pretty sure my actions were frowned upon." He still regretted his actions even while knowing he was just protecting himself from being taken advantage of. That wasn't his fault but he didn't want to be dragged into some drama regarding it and associating himself with Yuuto again. And the only reason he would is because of Sadie's business arrangement with the Usui family. Even now, he still felt bad about that because he hated causing problems for others. Remembering it only caused more tears to fall, he didn't want to cry but couldn't help but do so. And only for a moment, a part of him from his past began to show through his current emotions. "Gomen nasai, Yuu-chan," apologized, crying softly, addressing Yuuto by the name he would always call him instead of by his surname like he'd begun doing. |
(https://images2.imgbox.com/de/ff/yX94AdvF_o.jpg) | Sho sniffled once more, trying as much as he could to dry the tears from his face but no matter how much he'd done this, they'd continued to fall. Learning all of this about Yuuto was overwhelming for him. It wasn't difficult for him to take in but rather it was emotionally painful for his brain to deal with. He didn't like being placed in situations such as these because he knew he would be unable to control his emotions during them. Yuuto had gone through so much. He knew that now. While no one, including him, deserved to go through such hardships, it doesn't erase how things between them changed during their years apart from one another. Sho honestly believed he wouldn't see the other again and had accepted that. He'd moved on, made new friends, and made it his goal to work on forming a career in working as a comic book writer. Unlike others, he wasn't focused on settling down. It was the farthest thing from his mind. And he was fine with that. He had no one pressuring him in such a direction. He was allowed to be his own person without anyone trying to force him to change just to appease them. What Yuuto told him, he didn't have it so easy. And he understood trying to do everything on his own but something like that, not even Sho would be able to handle agreeing to something like giving up his close friends without seeking help from them. But for some reason, he felt thankful that he'd never met Yuuto's current family. Given what happened with his brother Tatsuya, he didn't want to imagine what it would be like to see his stepfather. That notion alone seemed frightening to him. Only Sadie was bold and confident enough to stand up to other Alphas, not fearing their threats of damaging her reputation or something much worse. Sho never liked conflict. He always tried to avoid it but it wasn't something that was easy to escape. It's just now, he had somewhat of a better handle of it that didn't always involve responding by hitting someone. Yuuto's brother may have been a garbage person but Sho still felt bad for hitting him. And knowing him, he was going to tell their stepfather about it too. It's why he told Sadie that he wouldn't be going with her next time she had a meeting with Yuuto or his stepfather. He didn't want to deal with that anxiety. People like that always felt like they were above everyone and everyone was below them. Being told by someone else that he wasn't worthy to be anything more was not something he wanted to deal with. That and Sadie possibly going to jail for trying to fight Yuuto's stepfather. And even though Yuuto may not have cared what his family thought about anything he did now, that didn't necessarily mean they wouldn't care. That's what worried Sho the most. It also didn't help that the other practically shouted this at him, making him flinch and look away from him. However, he slowly turned his head back to look at him upon hearing Yuuto address him by his name. His expression wasn't intense as it was moments ago, telling him to keep the gift he'd bought for him but also stating that he won't ever leave his side again. Sho didn't know how to respond to that and simply just stared at him, no longer trying to dry his face but instead letting his tears fall. His face was completely tear-stricken as he frowned. He didn't know what to feel outside of confusion. It would take time to forgive him. That was a given. That was not only because of Yuuto's actions in the past but because of his own as of recent. All he could do was sigh but what he had not expected was for Yuuto to hug him out of the blue. This action had made the green-eyed male's eyes widen in surprise as Yuuto had done this, making him blink a few times as the other male's arms were now wrapped around him, comforting him. It was a feeling that wasn't unfamiliar or strange to him. Rather, this action felt different because it wasn't being done by close friends or Austin even. No, this hug felt different and he hadn't known why. Being this close to Yuuto almost felt like a weird dream. The natural scent of him caused Sho's resolve to weaken as he sat there and allowed himself to be hugged, his cheeks stained red, unsure of what this strange feeling was and why he hadn't wanted to push Yuuto away from him. All he could do, all he could say was his name, spoken ever so softly. "Yuu-chan...." |
(https://images2.imgbox.com/de/ff/yX94AdvF_o.jpg) | Everything Sho was feeling, he couldn't properly explain it. At least, not out loud. He felt confused, nervous, uncertain, worried. Some part of him possibly felt scared to give the thought of making amends with Yuuto a chance. And his actions with his brother Tatsuya lingered in the back of his mind. Yuuto may not have cared what his family thought about what he did or who he interacted with but Sho couldn't help but be bothered by that. It took him awhile to get used to Sadie, given she came from a wealthy family background herself. She showed clearly that she never wanted to buy her friends with money and gifts. She only wanted to make her friends and others around her happy by bringing joy and fun into their lives. If that meant occasionally getting them things they wanted, she didn't mind doing that as money didn't matter to her. She valued the friendships with the people she allowed into her life. And also would look out for them to make sure no one would mess with that. That frightened Sho, in the beginning, having met her but seeing that she wasn't being violent toward him helped but didn't erase the fact that he feared her when she was upset. Thus he made certain to never get on her bad side. Overall, he did value her as a friend. That was something he'd once felt toward Yuuto but he was unsure if he could put that trust in him again. He wanted them to start over. That much was clear from the beginning. However, Sho knew how life worked. Nothing ever came easy. There would always be obstacles and Yuuto's family was that obstacle. Would he be able to handle dealing with them is question. All he knew was he wanted to avoid Tatsuya and he was sure that feeling was mutual. But this wasn't about Yuuto's family, per se. No, this was about the two of them. What did Sho want? Honestly, he didn't know anymore. Everything was just too much that he didn't know how to put his thoughts and feelings together properly to give a definitive answer. Yuuto hadn't released him, just steadily kept holding him. It was after a while he pulled away so the both of them could look at each other, with Sho's cheeks still flushed red. He came to some realization that he'd been addressing Yuuto by the nickname he'd always called him when they were younger and immediately covered his mouth and shifted his gaze to look away from him, clearly embarrassed by this. So much so that his hand was visibly trembling as he tried to calm himself down. His heart had begun racing so much that his body felt strangely warm. Sho had not realized at that moment some of his scent had begun to release, filing the area around only the two of them with the smell of cocoa butter and shea. Luckily for both of them, because of the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday, not many students were venturing about the campus today. Sho's scent hadn't traveled very far so they wouldn't be bombarded with anyone trying to attack them. But this would be the first instance that Sho released his scent unintentionally without paying attention to the fact that he'd done so. His emotions were running so high that he wasn't able to focus on that. "This is all ... so much right now," Sho finally managed as he lowered his hand from his mouth but he kept his gaze shifted in the opposite direction. |
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(https://images2.imgbox.com/de/ff/yX94AdvF_o.jpg) | Sho was silent, not saying anything more as he tried to calm himself down, his heart steady beating a mile a minute as more of his scent had begun to release. This was showing how nervous and emotionally overwhelmed he felt to a point that he currently couldn't control nor did he notice he was releasing his own scent. He was too busy trying to process everything in his mind and how to handle it all at once. It wasn't until he'd caught wind of another scent that he'd immediately looked up and wrapped his arms around himself as he just felt a sudden chill go down his spine. It was a scent that came out of nowhere and given they were the only two in the vicinity around them, the answer to his question was obvious: Yuuto was releasing his scent. Sho immediately became on guard as he turned his head and shifted his gaze in the other's direction as he'd spoke again, asking if they could exchange phone numbers. He was going to speak up about Yuuto releasing his scent and answer his question but was thrown off immediately by the comment of Sho's scent comforting him which caused the green-eyed young man to instantly move away from Yuuto to the further end of the bench with a horrified look on his face. It'd also made him realize that comment was only made because he wasn't aware that he was releasing his own scent which was affecting Yuuto as he'd stated it was. Thankfully, not in a bad way but that didn't make it any less comforting or embarrassing that he'd let his guard down. Sho did his best to calm himself down some more and to try and stop releasing his scent. The last thing he wanted was for anyone else that was still on campus to be inconvenienced by his scent and end up causing problems. Something he hadn't wanted. Currently, he'd forgotten momentarily about Yuuto asking about exchanging numbers with him to makings sure he wasn't anymore affected than he said he was regarding his scent. He wouldn't be dealing with this had this encounter hadn't happened today. He's fully aware of being in the pre-Heat stage and almost anything could set off his Heat early. This was not a place he wanted to be when that happened. His face was flushed red as he looked away from Yuuto, embarrassed for he didn't like discussing anything regarding scents and Heats with anyone. It was far too personal. He certainly didn't want to talk about that with Yuuto or him knowing about his Heat for that matter. "G-Gomen, I hadn't meant to do that," Sho apologized, breaking the silence again. Yet his mind had begun to wonder about Yuuto's scent... 'Why...? Why aren't I bothered by it...?' he thought, trying to figure out why he wasn't violently vomiting right now compared to normally. Even when he wasn't dealing with his Heat this would happen with any Alpha he came into contact with. It happened with Yuuto's brother Tatsuya so why didn't it happen ... with Yuuto ...? | |
(https://images2.imgbox.com/de/ff/yX94AdvF_o.jpg) | Sho hadn't met Yuuto's gaze as he'd spoken, apologizing as well for releasing his own scent. He could only imagine that it was normal in a sense for him to release his scent when it was warranted but Sho always made it a point to avoid doing so around anyone. Given how he reacts when his anxiety levels have risen, he had no reason to do so. It just seemed to cause nothing but problems for him, more so when it came to Alphas and everyone else around him who acted similarly yet not aggressively pushy just made him uncomfortable. The young man was always on guard around everyone, his friends included. While he felt bad about that, at least they did understand why he felt the way he did. It was just that others didn't seem to get the message. Even now, he remained on guard as he'd calmed himself down enough to stop releasing his scent but he could clearly smell Yuuto despite him having done the same. His face remained red in color and that chill from earlier returned. He kept his distance from him as he was still confused by what was going on with him, why he was feeling the way he was. More importantly, why he wasn't reacting to Yuuto's scent in the same fashion manner as other Alphas. Sure he wasn't trying to provoke or be aggressive but vomiting up his entire stomach was something he couldn't help doing. It was then he'd remembered this same thing had happened before but with Austin months ago. He thought it was a fluke then and didn't think much of it. But he couldn't ignore something like this and knew he had to speak with his doctor about it. But because of the holiday, the man wasn't presently on campus right now to inquire about this new occurrence going on with him. For now, he had to put it in the back of his mind as a mental note to do later after the break. Right now, he had to contend with figuring out what he wanted to do about the attempt at reforming his friendship with Yuuto. It felt as if a voice in the back of his mind was telling him to go for it despite every fiber of him not wanting to as he hadn't wanted the past to repeat itself again. However, he knew if he attempted to try and talk to Sadie about this, she'd either tell him to go for it and not let the opportunity go to waste, threaten bodily harm to Yuuto, or both. Probably the latter. It was difficult enough to get her to calm down when she was angry because he wanted to avoid her being sent to jail for almost or even murdering someone. That and he just didn't want anyone else involved in what the two of them had to figure out for themselves. Avoiding it would only get him chastised as well as cause more problems. Sho was internally struggling but everything won't resolve itself if he didn't try meet Yuuto halfway. After a long time of not seeing each other, Sho could say that Yuuto did at least apologize to him. That much he did give him. Everything else was going to take time. Sho lowered his arms from around himself, his blush finally receding as he was finally able to look in Yuuto's direction, looking down at the other's phone as he'd handed to him for him to enter his number into. Slowly and with much hesitance, Sho reached his hand out and took Yuuto's phone. For a moment, he held it into his hand, giving it some more thought as to whether or not this was a good idea. He couldn't say and no one could make this decision for him. He had to do it on his own. He'll never learn to completely trust anyone if he didn't at least try to mend things between them. And that nagging voice in the back of his head returned telling him to do it which had made his fingers begin moving on their own as he entered his phone number into his phone. After doing so, he didn't give the other his phone back right away. Instead, he used it to send a text to his own phone which was an emoji thumbs up which made the young man's phone go off inside of his bag. 'Am I doing the right thing? Is this okay...?' Sho thought as he handed Yuuto back his phone as he doubted himself and his actions. "Alright," Sho began, placing his hands in his lap as he twiddled his thumbs together, "You get one chance but ... if you screw up again, I'm never forgiving you," he said sternly. |
(https://images2.imgbox.com/de/ff/yX94AdvF_o.jpg) | Sho was glad that Yuuto didn't try to press things further. This was just the start of the two of them "trying" to fix their broken friendship. He wasn't even sure if it could be repaired but he was satisfied knowing that the other hadn't wanted to stop being friends with him. It was how he went about breaking off his friendship in such a childish and hurtful way that made the young man not fully trust him. Yuuto came from a wealthy family. He didn't know if his family would like the idea of the two of them being friends again after telling him to in a sense "ditch" him as a friend. The reasons were terrible but Sho learned a long time ago that influential families, especially the parents were like that with their children. They were trying to live and force their lives onto them while knowing it isn't something they hadn't wanted. Yuuto had been the unfortunate one to suffer at the hands of his family. Sho didn't have any words for that. He just found it very selfish that they were thinking of themselves and not Yuuto's well-being. 'I guess ... only time will tell,' Sho thought as Yuuto took back his phone. He'd thanked him for being given the chance for them to be friends again. Given that he only had one chance, most would not have bothered. Maybe there was the off chance he was serious about fixing things. However, their time had been cut short with Yuuto preparing to leave. While Sho almost corrected him by saying he wasn't being kept from anything too important, outside of his Heat and schoolwork, he opted out of doing so and simply nodded his head in response. He'd returned the wave with one of his own, albeit a small one as he watched Yuuto leave. All Sho could do was heave a sigh of relief as he was overcome with a small headache. He wasn't sure if that was from how awkward the exchange was between them or from having gotten a small whiff of Yuuto's scent. That was the last thing he needed given he was in Pre-Heat. He'd be lucky if he could concentrate on all his schoolwork before his Heat started. He knew he wouldn't be able to during it which was annoying but he was used to it. He took a moment to rub his temples before slowly rising to his feet and looking back at the table to make sure he didn't leave any of his papers behind. He hadn't. The only thing left on the table was the birthday gift Yuuto bought for him. He started down at the comic books in their plastic. He knew it would be terrible to leave them behind. It's not as if he hadn't wanted to accept the gift, but rather it didn't feel right for him to do so. Not really. But his hands moved on their own as he picked up the small stack of books and held them in his hands. 'It still feels wrong accepting this so I just ... won't read them until I feel as if I can trust him. I'm not ... there yet ...' he thought, as he placed the books into his backpack securely before taking his leave off the campus. He had a long ride back to the inn but he was used to the travel, not minding the commute in the least. But he had to be on high alert with the circumstances of his Heat being set off by someone. He'd definitely sit alone and away from everyone which was difficult at this time of day. Everyone was getting off work and traveling for the holiday vacation. Sho didn't know what that felt like to have a real vacation where he wasn't miserable. His current demeanor showed he was not looking forward to his Heat at all. Austin had been helpful enough just being around to make sure he ate something and he hadn't vomited back up but his friend had gotten busy with work so this Heat he'd be spending alone. 'I can only pray it won't be as bad as it used to be.' It's all he could hope for since he couldn't make his body stop going through these cycles. After about ten minutes, he'd made his way to the train station in the area. As expected, it was crowded. He'd gotten on the train that would get him home, managing to find an area to sit down that wasn't overly populated with other occupants. He was able to sit down in peace without being in someone's space and someone being in his own. As much as he hadn't wanted to, he reached into his bag and pulled out the scent collar, snapping it securely around his neck. He hated it but he wanted to avoid inconveniencing anyone during the ride home. He was originally going to put it on earlier but seeing Yuuto distracted him from that. And he certainly wasn't going to put it on in front of him to have him question why he was wearing it. The cynical side of him would've said none of his business if he'd asked. For the next thirty minutes, Sho's time was spent on the train until his destination had been reached. The number of occupants had also decreased as well by the time he'd made it home. Today felt weirdly like a long day for him despite only going on campus to get the assignments he needed to work on during the break and provided he could at least get the majority of it out of the way before his Heat began. Like he'd been doing, he'll do what he can and the rest he'll have to work on after. As he entered the front desk lobby of the inn, he waved at the associate manning the front for that current shift in the day before heading up the stairs to his room, taking his keycard out of his pocket, swiping it in the lock, and going inside. The first thing he'd done was remove his shoes and left his bag on the floor by the door alongside them, trudging his way toward the sofa and crashing onto it. He was mentally and emotionally exhausted. His head still hurt but not as much as it was earlier. Everything Yuuto told him was still processing in his mind. He couldn't say how things were going to go from here on out but he'd like for it to not stress him out and distract him. Though he had a feeling that's probably what was going to happen. Added stress to his life was par for the course with him. He didn't think it'd be in the form of his former friend. It was too late to back out now. He said he'd give him one chance and that was it. The rest was really up to Yuuto. Sho turned on his slide on the sofa as he closed his eyes as sleep began to overtake him. He was too drained to eat anything. All he felt like doing right now was sleeping and work out things later... |